


Meet me halfway to the end

by chrisemrys



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Allen and Nea are center characters but everyone will show at one point, Allen and Nea does not have a definite relation and can be seen as queerplatonic or implicit romance, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Family, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Most relations are open to interpretations, will add tags as story progresses
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-28
Updated: 2018-08-20
Packaged: 2018-12-08 01:44:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11636352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chrisemrys/pseuds/chrisemrys
Summary: He is running, from the ones that once were his home, from the one who killed the one person that could have answered him, from the souls that he promised to save, and from the ones that see only the shadow in him. He is running from the being that wants to take his place. Yet, why does he feel a growning need to face the 14th? Is Allen racing against Nea... or for Nea?





	1. Prologue

_Hello dears!_

_So I caved in and started to write for D Gray Man, as you can see. This Prologue is to give you all, and myself, a first feel of the story; this is going to be canon AU (in the sense that I've created my own story on why the war started and on details we still don't know)._

_This sets after chapter 205, so anything that comes after won't necessarily happen, but I do keep the knowledge (and I might still make some things happen). Considering I've already worked on details and how it all work together, do know I might not take into account anything the manga might reveal later, if it can't mix with the idea behind this story. As it is, so far (chapter 225), I managed to mix most of everything we've got with my canon au~_

_Now please note that I'm not sure when the next update will come. I feel a bit, well, shy toward writing Allen and other DGM characters; plus I need to finish figuring out some details. But I wanted to put the prologue out, see what you all feel about it, so here it is! And it is purposefully short, I wanted to give only a small feel~_

_I have a blog on tumblr (chrisemrys dot tumblr dot com) if you want to keep an eye on what I'm doing and where you can also ask me questions. I also plan to make a rp blog for Allen (from this story) to get experience writing him, although it's likely it might spoil you._

_**Pairings** : I don't plan on having any official ship in this story. However, I think some of the relationships can be read in the way you want, so some people might have more than platonic vibes. Some might even be written to give confusion if they're like family or if there are romantic feelings. So really, you can read what you want through the lines!  
Note: I might consider, later, make side story with official ships; but the main story remains without any official one._

_I don't have warnings to give for this chapter, I will put warnings in my ANs if they're needed. Good reading! On a small note, I've seen both Nea and Neah being used, and I decided to go with Nea_

* * *

 

**Meet me halfway to the end**

Prologue

_The sun warmed his hands as he turned the page of his book, aware of the soft breathing coming from the two frames resting against each side. One would think it would make reading harder, but not for him, he had grown used to moments like this._

_A soft couch, twins napping with their head on his shoulders, and the small but well place ray of sunshine to let him read with minimal movement._

_Fingers brushed through strands of red hairs, twirling one thin strand around the index gently, bringing his silver eyes to the side. Dark eyes, half open and more than half asleep, blinked slowly at the hairs before gazing up with a small frown._

“ _They're not right.” The young man muttered._

“… _Go back to sleep, N--” He huffed, not without the corner of his lips twitching up from the fondness he felt._

_But the young man frowned deeper, and surprised him by bringing the strand closer, kissing it. He watched the fluffy brown haired head rest back on his shoulder, the other going back to sleep, but not without a last mutter that froze his body and mind both._

“ _I'll find your light.”_

_He stayed unmoving with his gaze lost into the wall on the other side, mind blank. Soft breathing returned to his left, and then, a small smile formed._

“ _And I'll free you.”_

Allen Walker jolted awake, eyes wide open and heart beating wild, seconds passings before he even registered the sight of the alley he had dozed into. His body felt warm, but not in the uncomfortable way that he had learned to associated with the Noah inside him fighting for control. His left arm throbbed, one feather protuding out of it, a small warning that he would be in danger if he did not move soon.

But he couldn't. Not so soon. His dream had not left his mind, different from nightmares, different from the shadow lurking in his mind. In this precise moment, Allen felt all too aware, his thoughts process blank and yet screaming at him to keep this dream close to his heart.

Then more feathers formed, and he jolted back to the present, gazing down with a wince. Apocryphos was getting near, he really needed to move. Allen stood up, his legs too shaky at first, forcing him to lean against the wall.

His own reflection caught Allen's gaze, the grinning shadow standing behind him in it. He was ready to ignore it, but when he straightened to move, the shadow… flickered. For a second, Allen saw the one he had truly seen only once. Grey skin, golden eyes, short spiky hairs; the Fourteenth watched him.

Unlike his shadow form, he was not grining. His true appearance only flickered for a second, but his eyes were intense, catching Allen's own eyes. The white haired male could not read the expression he saw, or maybe, there had been no expression, a blankness that betrayed he might have seen the dream Allen had.

And then, the Fourteenth had smiled before the shadow form Allen was used to seeing was back into the reflection. But this time, the usual grin did not bother the exorcist on the run.

Not when he was still seeing the gentle smile the Fourteeth had shown. The same that he had given Allen when they had stood face to face for a very short time, back when the Fourteenth awakened fully.

_Why… Why do I want to return that smile so much?_

His left arm throbbed again, and Allen finally snapped his gaze away from the reflection, glancing down before sighing. Now was not the time to get lost in thought, he had to run before he was found; at least no Akuma had appeared yet. Knowing his luck, that would not remain true much longer, and he wanted to avoid facing two enemies at the same time for once, thank you very much.

So Allen pushed himself off the wall, clenching his jaws and willing himself to not think of the heat of his body nor the pain in his arm. Then, he walked forward, encouraged by the golden ball that had popped from his pocket, nuzzling his neck and bringing a smile on his face.

_And in a dreamscape of tall grass with a dirt road and a throne, Nea was looking up, dark bangs hiding his eyes._

_Lips still formed the gentle smile, which widened before he closed his eyes._

“ _Don't stop, keep walking. We'll meet soon.”_

_To be continued..._


	2. Chapter 1: Moving life

Hello dears!

I have finally decided to properly start this story, after the initial prologue I wanted to shape better the background infos, and then I decided to do WIP week, which gave me the final push to write the first chapter. I am also focusing on DGM fanfics now, though it can still take a bit to update (especially as I'd like to first finish Journey of our Hearts, and I participate in events). But Meet me Halfway remains one of two big work in DGM (the second one isn't out yet, I am likely to post the first chapter at the end of May) and it's about time I give you more than just the prologue!

This chapter is to set Allen's state and what he's been doing, but there are hints of the plot, more or less obvious~ I hope you enjoy!

 _Important note:_  I adjusted tags on AO3; and on the matter of pairings/relations, while there still won't be any clearly romantic/sexual relation, I would say there will be some relation open to interpretations. Meaning, while some give off friendship or family vibes, others will be queerplatonic, possibly borderline romantic.  
Among those, Nea and Allen will have a relation that isn't, in fact, definite. It looks queerplatonic, it might be deep friendship, or it might be lowkey romantic. That doesn't invalidate, either, that both will have other people close to them! So, again, read what you want, as I won't clearly define any relation.

* * *

**Meet me Halfway to the End**

_Chapter 1: Moving life._

The innkeeper raised his head as he heard the door open, a welcoming smile on his face. A young man, maybe in his late teens, returned the smile with a polite one, silver eyes glancing around at the rather empty inn. It was a smaller one, in a street with less passage, but seeing how the young man's shoulders relaxed, maybe this young traveller favored being less crowded.

As the young man approached, the innkeeper almost felt it rude that he wasn't removing his brown hat, but looking at the tired face and the reserved expression, he felt instead what he could only describe as a protective urge.

"Welcome! Are you here for a room?" The innkeeper asked, smile kind.

The younger man's own smile felt more genuine, and so, showed his exhaustion more. "Yes, please. I'm not sure yet how long I'll stay in town..?"

"This is no problem! Just try to warn me the day before, when you will vacate the room. I also offer breakfasts, and if there isn't too many customers, lunch and dinner can be shared." The innkeeper chuckled as those eyes brightened, and checking what the young man prefered, he fetched a key, being given in return the payment. "You have a name?" The innkeeper asked, friendly.

The young man paused, blinked, before smiling. "It's Tim, sir."

* * *

A sigh passed Allen's lips as he sat on the bed. He twitched as a wiggling in his shirt tickled him lightly, and then he smiled as Timcanpy finally got out, flutterring around the room before resting on Allen's laps. The white haired cupped the golem with his hands, glancing down at Tim with a soft smile.

"Finally a proper bed, eh, Tim?" The golem made a happy graa, which made Allen chuckle, gloved fingers rubbing the golem's body. "Let's just hope I'm not wrong, and the Fourteenth is being calm right now."

Allen had gotten used to guessing when he would have some days of peace, but still, he was never fully safe from the lurking shadow in his mind. It had been more than three months, almost four now, since he escaped from the Order's jail, since he ran from Apocryphos. He had known how hard it would be, and he was forever grateful he was able to stop for a few days at Mother's house. It had been risky, but it had been the only place he felt safe enough to rest at. For good measure, as since he left her house, Allen wasn't sure he got proper sleep.

It was bad enough that the Fourteenth's mere presence would cause bad dreams, but Allen felt plagued by his own nightmares, even though he couldn't recall them half the time. And of course, a sleeping Allen was a vulnerable body, so soon enough, Allen learned it was a very bad idea to sleep too long without waking. That was, of course, when he only had to worry about keeping control of his body. Only, as if fighting to not get his mind broken into pieces was a piece of cake.

But often, it wasn't actually the Fourteeth the real problem. Sometimes, he couldn't allow himself to rest, only little pause; because Apocryphos was way too close. Sometimes, the Order was way too close. Ironically, while Akuma did sometime try to catch him, Allen barely felt the Noahs. Or at least, close by; because sometimes, when the Fourteenth was being particularly active, Allen swore he could feel the others Noahs, perking, waiting.

Allen felt certain he had sensed Tyki and another Noah, the mind reader, close a few times. How he recognized who he sensed, he wasn't sure, and the fact it might be a Noah's sense made his stomach churn. Yet, and maybe that was what unsettled him more, it also… comforted him.

Still, being around people was a constant danger, for them and for Allen. Who knew when one of his pursuers might cause trouble, and who knew when he would have to fight for control. He was proud to say that, at least, he still hadn't allowed the Fourteenth to move his body. Allen wanted to say he never allowed him to surface, but after the first few times he jolted awake from Timcanpy biting his ear or hand, and especially after the first time he woke to Crown Clown sending a deep pulse of warmth, Allen resigned himself to what it implied.

He migth prevent the Fourteenth from moving his body, but he couldn't prevent him from being the one in control. It didn't seem to last more than a few seconds at most, but would he wake one day, only to realize he lost control for longer?

Allen's only comfort was the growing presence of Crown Clown. Since the day it reformed, Allen had felt Crown better, sensed for the first time sentience. It was in how he would feel a soothing warmth at time, how eventually he would hear a soft humming in his mind that he could not help comparing to purring, and how by now, he could pinpoint feelings similar to emotions. The sharp worry, the gentle wave of comfort, the burning protective anger. It felt nice, being able to tell his Innocence was protective of him.

And that it absolutely hated when Apocryphos forced it to do his binding. In fact, Allen realized, almost in shock, that as long as Apocryphos wasn't getting too close, Crown was actually resisting the call, resisting giving Allen's exact location. Allen had thought that, with how he couldn't eat as he used to, Crown might lose energy.

But no, even though fighting with Crown was harder, pushing Allen to avoid confrontation as much as possible, mere activation didn't cost as much. When Allen discovered that, he also found the trick that had made him last so long on the run.

He found that he could sleep with Crown activated, and as far as he had been able to tell, the Fourteenth couldn't surface during these times. Sadly, Allen couldn't always spare to sleep with an activated Innocence, but the good side was that he could count of Crown to wake him if it had to. He was also certain that a few times, he felt Crown push back the Fourteenth.

Of course, that brought its own tiredness, and its own need of energy. At least, little naps, resting without sleeping, and little snacks had helped. Timcanpy too, always so vigilant, and always very glad to provide cuddles. It felt nice, knowing the golem and his Innocence watched over his rest, and to know Timcanpy had grown to recognize the different signs of what Allen experienced.

Sensing the Fourteenth leaving its dormant state was also a sudden palor. Sensing Apocryphos coming in range, it was set jaws and little frown, it was feeling almost sick when he could tell the sentient Innocence felt glee at knowing Allen was close. But then, Allen was the one to feel a sharp smugness, when he felt Apocryphos' rage just before Allen went off his radar.

Still, while the Order and the Noahs made him feel on edge everywhere, Apocryphos was the one who made him feel chased, a sensation almost panic inducing when Allen couldn't escape for days on end, and in those days, sometimes he glanced at his reflection, and the Fourteenth's shadow felt less threatening. Sometimes, those glowing white eyes seemed to be golden, and softer.

Hadn't his master say the Fourteenth had been chased before his death? Was he seeing himself in Allen?  _Then why are you hurting me, Fourteenth?_

A faint pulse made Allen wince, and he knew right away he needed to think of something else. He long ago learned that, while he still wished he would understand this Noah that hijacked his body, letting his mind stray toward him only made it easier for that presence to grow stronger, to grow predatory.

Sometimes, Allen felt like the Fourteenth had a switch, going to maybe acceptable, to downright frightening.

Another pulse, and Allen stood up sharply. "Let's tour a bit the town, and see where I could eat." It wasn't just a distraction either, or better yet, it was the best one right now.

Because Allen did feel his strength wavering, warning him he did need to get some food in his system.

* * *

In the end, Allen took a first meal at the inn, and thankfully, since the innkeeper did notice Allen had looked tired, the white haired could play the card of how he had been on the road for a while and had spread out his food. So when Allen got two servings, almost three, the man didn't really think much about it.

Even if Allen didn't think this man would gossip about him, he had to be careful. His white hairs and his red scar, they were traits anyone having ties with the Order would look for. But so was his appetite, and it would easily reach the Order's ears, if a youth was seen eating a group's worth. And people would talk, if Allen allowed them to see.

So, the only solution to keep his energy just enough to move was to spread his meals across places. Providing, of course, that he could easily find different places to eat at, and that not many would notice him eating more than one meal. At least, his disguise as travelling performer meant no one really stopped at how many snacks Allen stacked for his journeys.

Still, Allen couldn't help but shiver, when he knew that more than half the time, he would not have enough strength to truly fight. In a sense, he was really glad that, for some reason, the only ones that could truly hunt him and corner him, weren't doing so. Well, Allen was good at hiding, he spent four years with Cross Marian moving all over Europe, Russia and India. But still, the Noahs could make it harder to hide.

Part of him had realized, at one point, that it might be because instead, Akumas that could locate him, tended to be where Apocryphos was. Obviously, he could deal with Akumas, and like Allen he knew to not stay once Noahs knew where he was. But then, was the clan keeping Apocryphos off Allen's tail? Were they just trying to capture the sentient Innocence, viewing it as a matter more urgent than cornering Allen?

In that case, should he take Tyki's presence he sensed at times, as the one assigned to watch Allen? If it was the mind reading Noah that was with Tyki, were they checking his mental state?

It was almost an headache, to try to understand, and Allen didn't want that spark of warmth, at the idea that the Noahs might look out for him. Or, more precisely, he didn't want to acknowledge how much he desired it, he didn't want to linger on it, he wanted to pretend it was just the Noah in him reacting.

He didn't want to acknowledge that, maybe, it was just him, too, that wanted it.

Allen noticed a restaurant finally, and he welcomed the distraction.

* * *

 

A meal and then another meal in a place on the other side of town, and Allen had felt good enough. He had mapped with Timcanpy well enough the town, and recalled well the few places he could get snacks from. Sometimes, he wondered how he could so easily have clear images of place and people, yet have such a bad sense of orientation. It was as if he knew where to go, but anything that wasn't a straight line confused him.

"Oh, what's that, mister?" A young voice asked.

Internally, Allen felt like freezing, but on the outside, he showed a gentle smile at the kid who had approached his crouched form, suitcase open to reveal a few colorfull props. A kid who approached from the left, just when Allen was adjusting the make-up on his face that hid his scar. He just felt glad that not many paid attention, and that he had a good excuse. Of course, the kid wasn't quite the problem. It was the parents, smiling nervously, though showing the lightest interest.

Perfect. Allen placed a finger on his lips, silver eyes mysterious. "It'll be something great, but it's still a secret right now." He moved some of the props lightly with his right hand, and the child's eyes brightened at the obvious clown nose. And more importantly, the parents behind looked more relaxed, smiling. Hook, line and sinker; they now thought his scar was the start of his disguise.

Which meant he would have to include it in his disguise, but it wouldn't be too hard. And with the parents getting their child to leave, with a soft promise of coming back later, Allen was free to finish adjusting the make-up, and set up his performance.

He hadn't quite planned to perform yet, but Allen didn't mind. As soon as the disguise was completed, he felt safer, people stopped paying attention to anything strange when stangeness was a clown's trademark. Besides, they were more focused on their amusement and awe, something that always warmed Allen's heart.

It wasn't just the memories of Mana, but it was how calm and happy he felt when he performed. He pretended to be a travelling performer, but sometimes, he wondered if it really was just a pretense. And Allen knew the answer. If Mana had been alive, they would have continued their life of travels and fun.

If Allen wasn't on the run, if he pretended strongly enough, he could really think he was just a young man who enjoyed travelling and performing.

* * *

It was on his second day in town, performing again, that of course, things went bad. Allen had finished his show, and he was grateful for that, because it likely saved any risks for the children. Allen felt a sharp alertness in Crown at the same time his left eye activated; and he barely had the time to jump up to a roof before an Akuma crashed into the ground where he had been.

"Fourteenth!"

Allen jumped backward to another roof, Crown activating, while three more Akumas, all level three rushed after him. He wished he could have more days of peace, but at least, he had just enough rest and food to be strong enough to fight. The Sword of Exorcism was not an option though, and so he slashed violently at the closest Akuma, sending it flying. The moment his feet touched the roof, he sprang up into the air, white tendrils shooting from the cape to pierce two of the Akumas. However, the initial one was suddenly there, colliding into him and sending him flying down, making him meet the ground painfully.

Warmth flood from his left arm, Crown was angry, and when one Akuma tried to impale Allen, even more tendrils shot from the fluff at his wrists as well as the one around his neck, piercing the Akuma in many places and sending such a rush of energy that it exploded, purified.

Allen used the occasion to slip off, rushing into an alley, back to the roofs, his eye telling him where the remaining threats were. He was able to jump back down when the three investigated where he slayed one of their comrades, claw slashing again and this time, exorcising the target. Crown reacted before Allen fully registered the two others attacking him from both sides, cape wrapping protectively around his frame. With a gesture, the right side of the cape flew out, cutting in two one Akuma, ending its existence.

The last one managed to grab Allen's head. Something pulsed furiously through him, and the next thing he knew, the Akuma was blasted backward, more purple than before. Not taking any time for confusion, Allen rushed after it, claws coming down and ending the final threat.

Alarm washed into his mind, distracting from what just happened, and making Allen glance to one of the street at the end of the alley, and his eyes widened slightly when he saw the coats of Finders. The white haired forgot all about confusing purple blast, and he was running before the Finders fully realized who had been there, but with the obvious battle and exorcism of Akumas, it was a matter of time until the alert was raised.

Allen Walker was there. And Allen needed to get away, before they had time to block any routes. So much for some days of peace.

* * *

Back against the trunk of a tree, Allen could finally rest some. He had ran far before starting to loop back, going through the forest. He had travelled through the night, very grateful for his left eye and knowing Finders or anyone tracking him would have a harder time. But he had fought Akumas, and eventually he had known he would need a small nap.

He really hoped he had loosen the Order from his tail, enough to rest. It twisted his stomach, how the place he had called home felt so… frightening, now. But really, what else could he have hoped for, making one place his home? In the end, it was Komui who made it so warm and welcoming, the science division, his friends… They were his home, they were the one he still wanted to believe could understand why Allen was left without choice but to run, that they trusted in him.

Loneliness hit like a sharp blade, and Timcanpy pawed at his stomach when he saw how Allen swallowed, eyes a bit misty. The young man glanced down, offering a weak smile, but both knew what made Allen like this. It was the grief of loss, because the day Central came into their life, they broke to careful warmth they all had worked their best to install.

Yes, after weeks on the run, Allen couldn't pretend he didn't feel a burning anger, a sharp bitterness, that the arrival of Leverrier and the CROWs had fueled even more the tensions, presenting Allen as an enemy when his friends struggled between defending him and the risk of being called traitors too. Then sadness washed over him, because didn't the Finders, didn't most of the staff, start to look at him differently when his connection to the Ark was learned?

Maybe if it was left only to Komui, he could have dealt with this as something to help Allen with. Maybe tensions would have lessened. Or maybe there would have still been a rift. But at least, he would not have been forced apart from his friends. And now, would he know if they needed him? What had happened to Kanda? To Link? How was Lenalee handling it? How was Komui handling it? Were Reever, Johnny and everyone working too hard? What of Miranda and Krory? What of Marie and Timothy?

Where was his master? Cross Marian, who left a message that felt too much like a goodbye, could not have known he might need such a goodbye, and do nothing. Cross Marian couldn't be dead.

Allen sighed, lightly hitting the back of his head against the tree. Timcanpy made a protesting sound, hovering up until he could plaster right over Allen's face. The white haired laughed, bringing a hand to wrap around the golem's body, gently pulling him off. He laughed again as Timcanpy nipped at his nose, not hurtful but with enough pression to express scolding.

 _Stop thinking, master,_ was what Timcanpy wanted to say.

 _Fine, fine,_  was Allen's reply, in the form of nuzzling Timcanpy to his cheek.

Satisfied, the golem went to perch on Allen's head, little paws petting the hairs while Allen adjusting his position, chuckling. There was a second of quietness, of nothing, and then with a little glow, his left hand turned into the claw, white spreading over the left arm, around his shoulders and down his right arm, down his back and over his head.

Timcanpy made a happy noise as Crown's hood covered him, and Allen glanced up with a smile, before letting out a happy sigh and finally, closing his eyes. The warmth of his Innocence felt so comforting, that it didn't take long for him to fall asleep, knowing that Crown would keep him safe, body and mind.

A beat peassed, then two, then three.

And Timcanpy observed, as golden eyes opened. Those eyes looked forward for a few seconds, and then slowly, there was a blink, and then, a soft smile. "Tim?" The voice, a little deeper, a little smoother, let out quietly.

The golem made a small, happy sound and gently slid out from the hood to hover in front of the face. Hands came up to cup the golem. "How is he doing?" Timcanpy let his wings drop a little. A sigh. "Guessed so..." The smile returned, still soft, but a little bit sad. "Just keep him safe, okay?" Timcanpy nodded, nibbling with affection at a finger.

Warmth rose, pulsed, and golen eyes drifted to the claw. "… I'm sorry..." Warmth washed over the body, and a startled laugh escaped. "I'm fine… You don't need to worry about me. Just worry about Allen..." Feathers ruffled around the neck, while the cape wrapped more tightly around the body. Lips twitched into a gentle, fond smile. "Bloody worrywart, just like him." And a snicker, when the end of the cape flapped up to smack gently the face. One hand came to push it off, and then, fingers rubbed the mask. "Thank you. We'll save him, I promise."

The mask shifted, like a smile, one returned before the head was rested back against the tree, and the golden eyes closed; body going slack in sleep.

With tender gentleness, white tendrils wrapped around the legs, adjusting the body more comfortably, the cape cocooning fully its precious master. The mask lifted slowly, resting carefully over the eyes, and Crown Clown guarded its master's rest, ready to move him if needed, ready to soothe away nightmares, and ready to push back the destructive, volatile presence if it had to.

_I will protect you, like I've always done._

_To be continued..._


	3. Chapter 2: Mystery for all

Welcome!

Finally, oh finally I update~ This is rather ironic for me that I took so long, because I am very comfortable with Allen and the overall story behind this fanfic, but simply: I could not decide what to do first. I know where this is going, and I know what won't happen yet, but I was left thinking, so what can happen and what should happen.

Turns out the answer is simple once I truly think about it: it's all a matter of dreams and Allen getting the right hints. And readers being given hints too.

And so, Allen has another dream, a scene you might recognize but who is not the same, and then, characters are thinking. Plural, yes. Somehow, Wisely and Tyki sneaked in with their POVs. Also: I discovered my writing of Wisely has this cutie get lost in thoughts easily. Give him one idea and he'll go through all it make him think about unless you stop him. More or less.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy, and don't hesitate to share your theories, I might confirm how close you are, who knows~!

* * *

 

**Meet me Halfway to the End**

_ Chapter 2: Mystery for all. _

_A young boy sat on the tree's branch, eyes closed as he hummed. There was sadness in the sound, in his expression, but it smoothed out as he heard the steps coming closer. Golden eyes slid open, and with a glance he confirmed the presence of a woman._

“ _Is the wind talking to you?” The woman's voice floated to him, and the young boy gave a wry smile._

“ _Maybe, maybe not.” He shrugged, then he gazed down fully. “Is he dying?”_

_The woman blinked, tilting her head. “Why would you think so?”_

_He gazed into the distance, small shoulders sagging. “Everyone saying so. Uncle saying he's too weak.” He blinked, feeling wetness clinging to his eyelid. “Even him is staying with brother.”_

“ _Nea...” The woman started, softly._

_And then she smiled, and lifted her skirts. Two young boys were revealed, one looking slightly guilty as the other exclaimed, “Boo!”_

_The boy in the tree blinked, and then his lips wobbled. “Mana!” He called out, jumping down. He stumbled a bit, and then he launched himself forward, two small pairs of arms wrapping around him. “You are all so mean!”_

_But he was laughing, breathing in the scent of his brother, feeling the two small bodies close, and feeling complete again._

Silver eyes slid open, blinking slowly, then they shifted to follow the golden orb floating above his head with questionning little sounds. Allen blinked again, and that was when he registered the tears falling down his eyes. Confusion showed in his expression, one hand lifting to brush those tears off his cheeks.

He froze when he noticed the grey skin of his right hand. He swallowed, staring, heart hammering. Timcanpy landed on his chest, making cooing noises, and warmth pulsed from his left hand. Slowly, his skin returned to his usual, pale color.

Allen breathed a sigh of relief. He dropped his arm over his eyes, taking deep breaths.

Try as he might, nothing but a tree and a wheat field remained from his dream. Or had it been a dream? He could see the blurry vision of the tree, of the sight around it, but then it had grown darker, and then too bright.

He had felt warmth, as if hugged.

Or had he observed it all? He could not tell anymore.

He could not even grasp the names, even when he could still hear the voices.

Allen felt his lips curl into a small smile. “Maybe he's closer and closer to me, if I'm seeing his memories….” He mused outloud, sadness with light fear slipping in his tone, his eyes.

Yet… He felt such a longing, such nostalgia, and he wondered, was the Fourteenth dreaming? Was Allen just seeing his dreams? Was he witnessing what the Fourteenth missed the most?

An ache started, making Allen groan as he moved his arm, instead placing the palm of his left hand over his face. It pained him for a split second, and then, a soothing coolness spread, softening the faint headache.

“Thanks, Crown.” Allen mumbled, and chuckled lightly at the little bell like sound he faintly heard, rolling like a purr, echoing with a sense of pride. A little nip at his jaw had Allen lifted his hand just enough to peek down, and he snickered at Timcanpy's pout. “Yes, you little imp, I'm not forgetting you.” The golem grumbled, but it turned in happier sound as Allen petted his round body, the smile of his master more genuine and fond. “I know you protect me too.”

And with both Innocence and golem having successfully distracted Allen's mind, the young man could finally moved out of his bedroll, stretching with a satisfied sigh, before digging into his suitcase for some breakfast.

* * *

 

The soft tune of the familiar melody was hummed as Allen walked into town, and he had long ago accepted the strange soothing he felt from it. Even before he had to run, he would find comfort in the Musician's room and the song that was the Musician's. Or his own, as the shadow had once told him the first time Allen found himself in the Musician's room.

He could not even find unease in how the song felt to him, because as days and weeks went, always on the move, always guarded; Allen grew to realize how much the song wrapped his mind with a gentle blanket.

While the Fourteenth could stirr from mere thoughts, he never seemed to react to the humming of the song. Maybe it was only because Allen wasn't using the Ark itself, or maybe… Maybe it appeased him, too.

It never worked if the Fourteenth was already stirring, though. In fact, Allen had learned the hard way, almost blanking out, that trying to hum the song would not soothe him, but rather, accelerate the way the Fourteenth struggled to the surface.

But that had been what confused Allen; he had felt it, how the Noah _st_ _r_ _uggled_. And he knew it was not about Crown, because it felt as if the Noah was already struggling. More than that… Allen recalled the sensation of unease from the Fourteenth himself.

What a strange Noah possessed his body… When he was asleep, the song soothed him. But when he stirred, the song seemed to agitate him.

It was as if there were two sides of this mysterious Fourteenth, and one that Allen could barely feel.

But anytime Allen's thoughts travelled toward this, the dark presence perked, lurked closer, as if waiting for the occasion to strike at Allen. And right now was no different, forcing the white haired to change his train of thoughts, heart thumping harder at the now familiar sensation of the dark pressure that made his head feel a little light.

A worried noise made his silver eyes lift to the golem that fluttered from his head to hover in front of his face. Allen smiled softly, lifting a hand to let Timcanpy land on it.

“I'm fine, Tim.” It was routine after all now, that he was not alone in his head.

That still made the golem grumble and nip at Allen's nose, making the young man yelp then chuckle.

“Tim! I swear, I'm-I'll be fine soon.” He corrected himself at the little growl, smile faint but genuine, eyes a little bit fond.

That appeased the golem, who nuzzled Allen's hand before going back to perch on his head, making contented noises.

And if he glanced toward a building's roof, he pretended not to notice the pull that made him do so, or the very sublte forms shadowed there.

Instead, Allen brought back his gaze forward, continuing his path.

* * *

 

“He knows we are here, doesn't he?” The man hummed, blowing out smoke. However, receiving no response, golden eyes gazed toward his fellow Noah. “Wisely?”

The younger Noah was frowning, but he blinked and finally looked toward Joyd. For a few seconds, the mind reader found himself going into his thoughts again, his own voice reminding that this current incarnation was called Tyki Mikk. Then he fully processed the lifted eyebrow and the hint of the worried, confused look.

“He does, and so does the Fourteenth.” Oh, how Wisely hated that no matter how hard he tried, despite being the sole Noah to keep the memories of all his Incarnations, he could not recall the Fourteenth's name. In truth, he could barely recall the man, and only the sight of Tyki the first time they met had reminded him with clarity that Joyd's reincarnation was a physical copy of the Fourteenth.

_Why, Joyd? This cannot be a coincidence, that you would reincarnate to mirror the Fourteenth._

A finger poked Wisely in the forehead, though at least considerated enough to not touch any of the three eyes there. The younger male made a sound, expression turning into a small scowl that was almost a pout, cheeks a little bit pink under Tyki's little smirk.

“So he's watching us?” Tyki asked, only for Wisely to frown again.

“I am unsure...” He started with hesitation, then continued under Tyki's inquisitive look. “I can sense his presence lurking behind Allen Walker, but I cannot pick thoughts. It is as if he is using his instincts as a shield...”

A shiver went through his body without his control. Wisely could in theory try to dig deeper into the minds in this one body, poke at the Fourteenth's mind. However… The murderous, dark instincts were enough to tell him there were many ways for such a venture to finish in a bad way.

If Wisely was honest with himself, this was not his main reason for ruling out the option of prodding the Fourteenth's mind. No, if Wisely was honest, he just did not want to repeat the mistake.

Fully awaken or not, Wisely had no doubt the Fourteenth would be able to break his mind, make him fall in mental agony until someone ended his suffering by ending his life. And even if death would be a better option that what the Fourteenth could do to his mind, Wisely did not want to risk losing even more memories.

It was bad enough he could not even recall what happened, only the seemingly never ending agony of his mind, his own screams, the feeling of tears on his cheeks that weren't only his own, and finally, the physical pain before he blacked out, only to exist again, feel pain again from his awakening, and finally, finally, feel the comfort of the Millenium's presence once more.

No matter how many time he tried though, Road never replied to the one confusing fact.

Why did their precious Millenium Earl feel so sad and not quite right?

_Soon, little brother. But not now._

Everyone else trusted in the oldest that had lived through the traitorous acts.

Wisely trusted the memories that stayed intact, trusted the same wish he knew his older sister had.

_I need to know, Fourteenth, how your smile could turn into this murderous grin I fear the most._

* * *

 

Tyki watched Wisely fall into his thoughts again, but this time, he did not try to bring him out of them. He did sigh, but of course, it was not heard. He shook his head with a fond little chuckle, slowly breathing in his cigarette as his gaze travelled in the distance toward Allen.

He could not pretend to ignore the pang of worry for the boy. It had never fully hit Tyki, how dangerous the infamous traitor was. Knowing that the previous generations got killed was one thing, but witnessing the results, the Earl's sadness and pain as the Fourteenth was revealed to have come back, the masked sorrow of Road, and the fear Wisely possessed of his own death…

It made Tyki feel a strange mix of anger and nervousness. Not solely for his own safety and his family's, but for Allen. To think that the boy had this being in his mind, battling to gain dominance and yet resisting still…

Yes, Tyki could admit to himself that he worried for Allen Walker, as much as respect grew even more.

He was best placed, after all, to know what it meant to have your inner Noah try to override your sense of self. Still…

Joyd never tried to make Tyki vanish. Joyd had been furious that Tyki resisted losing his white side so much that he restrained Joyd, never allowing his inner Noah to fully awaken until that fateful day at the White Ark.

But even when Joyd could have done so, they never erased Tyki, nor did they modify Tyki's affection for his human friends.

So how could it truly be, for the boy with a Noah that seemed intent on destroying his mind and take over fully?

_Hang in there, Shonen. If you have to become the Fourteenth Noah, don't let it be by force. Don't let the Fourteenth erase you unless it is truly what **you** desire._

Tyki felt glad that Wisely was lost in thoughts, because the pang of wrongness, the true desire within Tyki that Joyd did not seem to mind, was one the man felt only Road might share.

_If anyone can win, it's you, Allen. Please don't lose yourself._

_To be continued..._


End file.
